subscribe to the Low Twelve Brutal Email List and get these reports sent to you every week . . . for FREE!
|
BRUTALITY REPORT
WARNING! |
IN THIS WEEK'S ISSUE: |
| ► Mother's Day
Tribute ► More "Splatter Pattern" Updates ► Wes and Michelle Wedding Next Saturday ► More Hot Chicks in Brutality Report XXX This Week |
 |
So what in my brutal CD player this week? |
|
|
| 1. Kreator - Hordes of Chaos (killer new thrash metal) | |||
| 2. Bolt Thrower - Mercenary (wicked UK death metal) | |||
| 3. Cannibal Corpse - Evisceration Plague (still jamming this brutal new death metal) | |||
So good to see you back in brutality once again my friends . . . especially as the Brutality Report salutes all the moms out there on this special Mother's Day! Of course you know that my warped mind would not just do any kind of tribute . . . but a very Low Twelve sort of tribute that would of course be vile, sexist, and juvenile. That's why you love this shit though isn't it?
As I close in to the 500th Brutality Report, I've got more "Splatter Pattern" updates on how things are going with the new Low Twelve CD. Plus we'll be at Wes and Michelle's wedding next Saturday and none other than yours truly . . . Pastor Pete will be officiating the wedding ceremony. It's almost criminal isn't it? All that and more in the report this week. Of course I've got one very nasty Skank of the Week in tribute to moms out there, plus the usual array of hot chicks in the Brutality Report XXX if that's your thing. If it's not . . . then don't check it out. It's that simple really.
So here's to all the MILFs and GILFs out there who read the Brutality Report. Rub that pussy while you read ladies so us perverts can think about that while we spank the night away!
Now get on with it.
| CHOPPING BLOCK REPLAY |
hosted by Pete Altieri |
|
Last week I posted the May edition of the Heavycore Chopping Block. If you missed it, then check it out now or die. As most of you know, I host this show every month and it's now syndicated on many internet metal radio stations - some playing it each day. So it gets a lot of listens. Check it out and see for yourself why so many metal freaks dig the brutalness of it all. Listen to the NEW Heavycore Chopping Block part 1 (mp3) part 2 (mp3)
Part 1
Arsis - We Are the Nightmare Cannibal Corpse - Pit of Zombies Bloodbath - Sick Salvation Obituary - Dead Silence Sodom - Sodomized (live) Decapitated - Spheres of Madness Lividity - Exhibition of Carnage Embalmer - The More Fuckers Dead, The Better
Part 2 If you're in a Heavycore band and want to me to play your stuff on the show - send it in: Heavycore, PO Box 554, Heyworth IL 61745. If I like it - I just might play it. The only way to know is send it in. If you're not a member of Heavycore, then go to www.heavycore.net to apply for membership and if you're heavy enough - we'll let you into the brotherhood and you can reap the rewards of being a part of our underground metal movement. Take that you bitches! |
| WES AND MICHELLE TO WED NEXT SATURDAY |
|
|
Next Saturday, May 16th - Low Twelve drummer Wes Pollock will be getting married to his girlfriend Michelle. Michelle has been a fixture at our shows, running the merch table while we play and helping out taking pics and that sort of thing. So she's been like family for a while! I'm happy for the both of them. I've been telling you all that they asked me a year ago, to become an ordained minister so I could officiate the wedding! They didn't want a religious service (that's good - because I hate that crap too) and knew that I could "work a crowd". I promised Michelle I wouldn't throw tampons or anything. Back in March I got the actual certificate from Rose Ministries that said I was ordained and now I'm officially Pastor Pete Altieri. It still sounds funny when I read that. We'll be in a really cool rural location in Piatt County Illinois for the ceremony, and then back to Bloomington for the reception. It should be a good time. Former Low Twelve axemaster Les Aldridge, will be the best man, and in the wedding party are also Dan and Meister. Meister wanted to be the flower girl, but Michelle said no. So he had to settle for being a groomsman! It will be funny seeing us all "decked out" for the day . . . but I'm sure the camo shorts and black t-shirts will come out as soon as humanly possible. We'll be taking lots of pics I'm sure and will post some of them in the next Brutality Report. So once again . . . huge congrats to Wes and Michelle on this big event. I just hope Pastor Pete lives up to his end of the bargain and doesn't slip in a "fuck yeah" or anything. Ha. |
- click here for more information on how to reach 10,000 metal heads each week with your ad!
Check out our xxx adults only section of the Brutality Report!
Guaranteed to make you jerk what you got!
| SPLATTER PATTERN UPDATES |
|
| We changed gears a bit this
week and instead of Dan coming in to begin his guitar tracks, I decided
to work on some vocals first. So I spent two long nights recording
"A Hero's Last Stand" and "Mountains of the Dead" on vocals. So
far they are turning out wicked with the brutalness of my new "Big
Daddy" microphone. What a huge difference it has made! The
vocals are incredibly clear this time around and I'm anxious to hear the
best of the music to go along with it. Right now I'm singing to
Meister, a click track, and some rough drums Wes put together to help us
get moving on our parts. But it still slays! Coming up soon I'm going to post some more video of us recording the CD. I've got some good stuff from Meister's sessions and will put a cam in the booth along with me while I do some vocals. We did a contest on the myspace page to see who could figure out which of the songs we were recording was a remake of an old Low Twelve classic. Well - Jason from Lombard Illinois was the first one to crack it! He guessed right, it's "Lines Drawn". We'll be doing that classic song as a special bonus track on the new "Splatter Pattern" CD. Hell yeah, it's one of my favorite Low Twelve songs to play live! So keep your ears open for some rough mixes as Dan puts his guitar tracks down, as well as me doing my bass tracking. Layer by layer the new CD is taking shape. Even artist, Jeff Gaither, is hard at work on the cover and other artwork that will make up the packaging. It's going to be sick as fuck! But did you expect anything less? |
| DON'T FORGET ABOUT XXX! |
|
| Last year we started taking
some of the more "extreme" photos off the Brutality Report so that
others could enjoy following Low Twelve and Heavycore without having to
see that sort of stuff. So we starting doing the Brutality Report
XXX - for you more hardcore bastards (or bitches) out there. As you know, we've got lots of hot chicks on the Brutality Report XXX page. But, that's only for adults, so if that's not your thing, or you're not legal to check that sort of thing out, then don't go there. You must be 18 or older to see that sort of thing - so you've been warned. But if you are legal to see that stuff and wish to - then you can see hot chicks like Nikki (pictured right) and many more, doing some nasty things. So why not check out lots of free picture and movie galleries where you can see sexy teens getting naked and performing acts that only adults can see. We do a feature each week of one of the hottest young girls on the web - offering several galleries for you to check out. Some have movies on them too, so you can see much more than still shots. We also post several more galleries - featuring girls that do nasty things. We also have an archive of past galleries, so you could wind up with a disability claim from all the jerking you're about to do! So be careful and don't hurt yourselves . . . we need you in the trenches - being brutal as ever for the underground metal movement. So that gives you an idea of what's in store . . . lots of hot teen chicks doing nasty things. Need I say more? Just one last time - remember you must be 18 or older to see such things . . . so don't go there unless you're legal. Click on the link below if you want to check out Brutality Report XXX and don't come whining to us if your cock gets sore from all the jerking - or if you're a female and that nub gets worn down. Enjoy the perversion! Happy jerkin'! |
subscribe to the Low Twelve Brutal Email List - it's free!
order
the latest Low Twelve CD
"This Side Toward Enemy"
SCHEDULED LOW TWELVE BALL SLAPPINGS
Few can match the heaviness of Low Twelve live . . . . come see for yourself why soundmen all over the US have scratched their heads and asked "are you sure there are only four of you up there?". Come out and support some seriously brutal metal and get a tampon thrown in your face too. To book Low Twelve - email us at contact@lowtwelve.com
|
|
Saturday May 30th
at Coconut Louie's, 2303 E. Washington
Street, Bloomington IL
10pm, 21 and older, $5 cover
with Stinkditch and Ocularis
Saturday June 6th
Miller Bash '09, 18735 East 1100 North
Rd, Westville IL
4pm, all ages, OUTDOOR PARTY, $3 per person
food, drinks, and parking available
with Gritheryn, Blessed with Pain, Ire, Reign of Cerebus, and Uncovered Remains
Saturday June 13th
Welcome Home Ian Show - Private Party
- Bloomington IL
details pending
with Ocularis and Seven Year Existence
Saturday July 18th
Local Soldier Going Away - Private Party
- Heyworth IL
details pending
with Ocularis and another band tba
Saturday September 26th
POSER ROAST at the Hoopeston VFW, 4th & Orange St,
Hoopeston IL
details pending, all ages (21 and older can drink with ID)
with Fallen Oath, and more tba
Saturday October 31st
Hallowfest V Show! 2 stages - 10
bands!
at the Rossville VFW, Route 1,
Rossville IL
details pending, all ages (21 and older can drink with ID), $3 cover
with Stinkditch, Zeroshift and more tba
contact@lowtwelve.com for booking
| LINKS YOUR ASS SHOULD KNOW! | |||
|
Heavycore - main site myspace online store Killer Karaoke - main site myspace Rotting Corpse Records - Blabbermouth - Jeff Gaither - Mike Stoltz - Consumption Junction - Rotten.com - Phil Flash |
|||
Thanks for reading the Brutality Report . . . we hope you enjoyed your weekly brutalization. If you would like to be added to our email list to receive the link to this report each week then fill out our email form. It's that simple!
Brutal 24 Fuckin' 7,
Pete Altieri
pete@lowtwelve.com
