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BRUTALITY REPORT
DATE POSTED
WARNING! |
IN THIS WEEK'S ISSUE: |
| ► Poser Roast 23
Kicks Ass ► Meister & Dan's First Show ► More Meisterism Madness ► More Hot Chicks in Brutality Report XXX This Week |
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So what in my brutal CD player this week? |
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| 1. Aeon - Rise to Dominate (completely brutal death metal) | |||
| 2. Arsis - United in Regret (completely wicked technical death metal) | |||
| 3. Venom - Black Metal (going back to my roots) | |||
So good to see you back in brutality once again my friends . . . it's been an insane week here in the Low Twelve Command Center as preparations for the big Poser Roast 23 show took a front seat! We had one hell of a great time and all the pics to prove it! WOW - what a weekend. It ended with Low Twelve, front and center, throwing down to a sea of rabid Low Twelve fans and busting out Meister and Dan for their first performance. It was a great success and you'll see the pics. In addition, I shot quite a bit of video that I'll be showing you in the next few weeks as I edit things down and get to see how it turned out.
In addition to all that, I've got a new Heavycore DVD that I plan to put together from the Poser Roast 23 show called "United in Metal". So stay tuned for the details with that. Also I've got more Meisterism madness, that seems to be catching fire as more and more people are sending in emails, posting shit on myspace, and even calling me with new Meisterisms every day. If you don't know what I'm talking about, then read on and I'll explain what the fuck is going on in my warped mind. In addition to all that, we've got some new hot sluts in the Brutality Report XXX page - so check that out if you're legal to see the nudity. Speaking of nudity, Crazy Mike really out did himself this weekend as he captured a girl lactating all over his face. It's sick - but very "Low Twelve" if you get my meaning.
So you metal freaks out there who love the sick, disgusting, and brutal - read on with vigor. You pussies out there who love to read this shit just to keep tabs on what a real metal band is like . . . while you puss out and watch MTV and think you're a bad ass with your black fingernail polish and braided hair. Hold your face right there near the monitor, so I can cave it in with my steel toed boots of love.
Now get on with it.
| MEISTERISM MADNESS |
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| As you loyal Brutality
Report readers know, the Meisterisms began a few months ago after
Meister joined Low Twelve. I was checking a microphone at
practice, and the "testing 1-2-3" thing got pretty old. So I
started fucking around and saying Meister's name, making my voice sound
funny and shit. Meister was tweaking the knobs on his PA while I
did this, and laughing at my stupidity. Then I started taking the
name Meister and putting it names of songs, in place of another word . .
. like "Meister of Puppets", or "Diary of a Meister" . . . you get the
idea.
So once I posted that here in the Brutality Report, fans have been enjoying the new game. Of course in the Low Twelve family of fuck-ups - we love doing it all the time and Meister has been a good sport about it all. Dan and I really get into some funny text message wars going back and forth with Meisterisms. It's a lot of fun. Even my 16-year-old son Joe, has been doing it with his friends. Now the fun thing is to pick one that falls into a certain genre or topic. Let's saw Western movies for example. Then you start going back and forth with a few friends, seeing how many good ones you come up with. It's hysterical. Last night Dan and I were doing the Western movie theme and came up with - "The Good, the Bad, and the Meister", "Outlaw Josie Meister", and "Hang 'Em Meister". It's really an endless source of fun. Try it with cars, movies, tv shows, band names, songs, books, whatever you want. I even came up with one "A bird in the hand is worth two in the Meister". So have fun with it! Let's try and see how many of you can come up with some funny company names with the word Meister. The funniest one gets a free copy of "Roasting Posers Volume I" DVD. How about it? Send your ideas to me at contact@lowtwelve.com |
| NEW HEAVYCORE DVD IN THE WORKS |
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I was not successful putting a Heavycore compilation CD/DVD out last year like I hoped. But I came up with an idea this past week that I think would be a good way to do a compilation with little expense to get it off the ground. I thought if I shot a song or two from each band at the Poser Roast, I could put the videos on a DVD, with maybe a couple funny Poser Disposal Service commercials on there for fun - I could release it and help spread the word and give the bands a good marketing tool for themselves. So I'm thinking of naming it "United in Metal" and I'll keep you all posted on how it's coming along. I haven't had the chance yet to go through the video I shot from the weekend, so I am not sure how things turned out. But I am hopeful it will be good enough for release. Thanks again to all the band who played Poser Roast 23 - it was a blast! |
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| POSER ROAST 23 - AFTERSHOCKS |
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| We had a great time at Poser
Roast 23 this weekend! We did the shows on Friday and Saturday
nights, since we couldn't do more than three bands each night at
Paulie's. But it was killer just the same and everyone at Paulie's
(Bloomington Illinois) was cool to us and made the shows a lot of fun. On Friday night they had the local rock station (96.7 FM) on location giving away Slipknot tickets and even had the Miller Lite girls on hand to give them away and sign people up for the contest. The crowd was slamming too, and so the excitement was in the air for a good show! I was pleasantly surprised at how killer the first band, Where Dead Men Walk, from Pekin - tore it up! These guys really sounded good, and were brutal as all hell. Ironically, the bass player, Joe Merideth is actually my wife's cousin. I hadn't see him since he was a little fucker many years ago, so it was a trip seeing him throwing it down Heavycore style. Hell yeah! After them were local favorites In the Wake of the Butcher, who also put on a sick display of death metal. It was wicked. Even though Human Artifacts had to drop off the bill, these two bands brought the pain big time and set the stage for Ocularis to close out the first night. They also put on a great show and it was good to see their new bassist finding his way around and making the band sound tight as fuck. |
Check out some pics from the first night bands!
Where Dead Men Walk
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In the Wake of the Butcher
Big Mike Collier, Ocularis (none of the
full band shots turned out, so I thought this one was killer - go Big Mike!)
While all the madness was going on, and the pit was swirling . . . Crazy Mike took off with the camera to find some girls who wanted to show their tits to him! Of course he found some . . . but wound up doing something we've never had captured before. He found some chick who was nursing a baby (not at the show, but just had the kid and was nursing him/her) . . . and she wanted to show off that she could squirt her breast milk on him. He told me later that she "soaked his clothes" and "got it all over his face". He was totally into it (ha - go figure) and even thought enough to catch some of the lactating madness on camera! Check it out along with another nice double titty shot and a sweet solo shot. Man, the chick on the left has some legendary boobs! Nice!
Fuck yeah Crazy Mike! You can always count of him to deliver the goods! Well, after the first night's success, we were hopeful we'd have a repeat on the Saturday night show. We had a blast at that one too! The crowd was slow for some of the early part of the show, but as the night went on, more and more Twelve Heads piled into Paulie's to see the new crop of band and the debut of Low Twelve with Dan and Meister.
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It was great to see many friends that
came out. Even former guitarist, Les Aldridge (see left with Wes)
came out to see the show! Fuck yeah, it was good to see him again.
There were a couple of fans who were in St. Louis at the Cardinal game,
who broke the speed limits to make it back to Bloomington to catch the
show. Tim's cousin Geno was in the house, and many other old Low
Twelve fans who were there to see the new era of Low Twelve.
First up was Skeptik and they put on a great show. They had broken up, but then reunited a few months later and now are back in the action! How sweet is that? It was awesome to see them all again too - as they've become great friends of ours. In addition, from Chicago came the band Vesicant - who tore it up righteously. They had a new bass player and guitar player, so it was good to check out the new lineup. They sounded kick ass and the fans seemed to like their show big time! It was also great to see them all again, even though Cheno is a big Boston fan, I'll let it slide. Ha. Check out some pics from the second night of mayhem . . . it was a blast and the locals enjoyed a display of wicked metal for sure! |
Skeptik
Vesicant
Low Twelve
Meister, Low Twelve (this has to be the
coolest live shot ever)
Dan, Low Twelve
Wes, Low Twelve
Pete, Low Twelve
How about some kick ass photography from Mike "Sexy Bearded Handy Man" Stoltz? WOW! Crazy Mike was filming us with a video camera while this was all going on, so Stoltz helped out. Thanks Mike!
We opened up with "Defiance to the End" and then busted into: Lines Drawn, Within Lies, Chopping Block, Bind Torture Kill, Begging to Die, Bodies in My Pocket, Scourge, Dying Room, and of course - Crawlspace. The fans dug the shit out of it, and we had a lot of fun up there tearing it up. After the show, many fans said that it sounded really full and even more powerful with two guitar players. Les called me today to say that he was very pleased with how things sounded and echoed what other said about it being really full sounding. It was nice to get such rave reviews, and coming from Les - it meant a lot to us all.
I did something at the show that I did back in 2000 when Wes did his first show. I gave Meister and Dan, while on stage in the middle of the show, a jar of maraschino cherries. It was for "breaking their Low Twelve cherry" for doing their first show. It was a blast and Stoltz grabbed a couple pics of them with their cherries!
We had our past manager (Phil Theehor) in the house too . . . and of course along with none other than Crazy Mike!
Thanks again to all who came out in support - we appreciate it. I'm sure we'll be back again at Paulie's sometime soon - I'll keep you posted on that. It's a great bar for a metal show . . . so we'd love to tear it up again to the hometown crowd.
Stay tuned in the next couple Brutality Reports because I'll be posting some video clips from the shows . . .
| DON'T FORGET ABOUT XXX! |
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| As you know, we've got lots
of hot chicks on the Brutality Report XXX page. But, that's only
for adults, so if that's not your thing, or you're not legal to check
that sort of thing out, then don't go there. But if you are - then you can see hot chicks like Taylor (pictured right) and many more, doing some nasty things. So why not check out lots of free picture and movie galleries where you can see sexy teens getting naked and performing acts that only adults can see. So click on the link below if you want to check out Brutality Report XXX and don't come whining to us if your cock gets sore from all the jerking - or if you're a female and that nub gets worn down. Enjoy the perversion! Happy jerkin'! |
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SCHEDULED LOW TWELVE BALL SLAPPINGS
Few can match the heaviness of Low Twelve live . . . . come see for yourself why soundmen all over the US have scratched their heads and asked "are you sure there are only three of you up there?". Come out and support some seriously brutal metal and get a tampon thrown in your face too. To book Low Twelve - email us at contact@lowtwelve.com
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Friday August 15th
at the Metal Church, Stanford Illinois
7pm, all ages (21 and older can drink)
with Zeroshift, Slavereign Nation, and Fire Pie
Saturday September 27th
at Metal Up Your Tap @ Redline Tap, 7006 N. Glenwood, Chicago Illinois
Rotting Corpse Records Showcase
9pm, 21 and older
with Whorrid, Ebonmortis, and Deadnight
Friday October 31st
Halloween Bash
at the Phoenix, 215 S. Neil St, Champaign Illinois
9pm, 19 and older
with bands to be announced
Saturday November 1st
at the Rossville VFW, Rossville Illinois
Hallowfest IV Show
8pm, all ages - 21 and older can drink with ID
with Stinkditch and bands to be announced
contact@lowtwelve.com for booking
| LINKS YOUR ASS SHOULD KNOW! | |||
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Heavycore - main site myspace online store Killer Karaoke - main site myspace Rotting Corpse Records - Blabbermouth - We See Dead People - Jeff Gaither - Mike Stoltz - Consumption Junction - Rotten.com - Phil Flash |
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Thanks for reading the Brutality Report . . . we hope you enjoyed your weekly brutalization. If you would like to be added to our email list to receive the link to this report each week then fill out our email form. It's that simple!
Brutal 24 Fuckin' 7,
Pete Altieri
pete@lowtwelve.com
